I am taking a much-needed break over the holidays. We have been at it pretty hard. I had wanted to do a show on surviving the holidays but will collect interesting links instead. We will resume after January 5th with a show favorite returning! Here is #bicelebhero Crystal Bowersox and her bi coming out song…
For many of us the holidays are fraught with pain and loneliness. Those who are out are often shunned and ridiculed at this time by their loved ones. Those who cannot be out often have to endure quite bigoted comments and have to struggle to rise above them.
We encourage everyone for their own emotional well-being to be out. But for some this is not a safe thing to do at this time. So we encourage emotional, physical and financial safety first.
Those who are out and separated from their families, homeless, lonely, know you are loved. Those who can’t be out and are dealing with guilt because of that, you are loved just as much. You may feel less then heroic. Know that by the simple fact you are a survivor you are.
Take comfort in the knowledge you are free of the box. And take pity for those who hurt you because they are so deeply trapped in it.
A friend sent me this. My heart breaks for them.
“God, I hate my family sometimes… Here I am fighting off my depression all fucking day, then as soon as I get home, they make me sit with them and “hang out.” As the conversation casually drifted into a transphobic hate speech.
And apparently they have no idea that their son is a closet transgender who has wanted to be a girl his entire life (or at least since he was old enough to understand gender differences).
I can’t talk to them about me being asexual, atheist, or transgender until I’m out from their house. Or about the fact that I need regular therapy and antidepressants just to keep myself sane in this family. If they know about that stuff they’ll fuck up my life.
It’s sad. I can be so active for the community away from them, but I can’t even come out myself for anything about who I am because I’m trapped.
All of this bullshit just makes me want to give up. But I’ve been fighting that for years. At least with the antidepressants I can keep fighting for my sanity.
I had to take a 45 minute nap in my car after class today because I just couldn’t handle much more.”
END OF QUOTE
(posted with their permission)
Below are some resources that may help you survive these days. We encourage you to join Facebook groups and seek local support. When your family fails you, build your own supportive family.
Are you alone this Christmas or stuck with an unaccepting or bigoted family? Do your family mean well but you just desperately need some time away? We’ve set up a chat on Bitopia for you this Christmas so head on over and say hi.
YOU ARE NOT WRONG. YOU ARE NOT BROKEN. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.