After catching up on the LGBT Task Force debacle (in which they published an article called “Bye Bye Bi”… sigh), I feel compelled to state publicly:
I deeply value and cherish openly self-identifying bisexual people – not just because they deserve to be valued as human beings in general, but because I genuinely believe their experiences create bridges between seemingly disparate communities, and in really powerful ways. They’re owed more than an apology each time society messes up. They’re owed our gratitude.
This year, I attended two awesome weddings, each between a bisexual woman and in one case, a man, and in another case, a lesbian. Their weddings felt like a trip to utopia. All kinds of people – queer and straight – laughed, cried, danced, and celebrated love, transcending all notions of what it means to be on a ‘side’. No one wanted their weddings to end because in comparison to the diverse, affirming spaces they’d created with their love and unity – not just between each other, but between their friends, and families, with varying beliefs – the real world, quite plainly, sucks.
Given how much bullshit and casual bigotry exists against bi people, both from heterosexual and queer communities, I am actually really *grateful* to the folks who are able to stand their ground and not shy away from the label, no matter the repercussions. Certainly, bisexual people aren’t the only ones who experience this – but given we’re in LGBT history month, and I’ve already seen so many instances of self-identifying bi people being left out / ignored, or in some cases, deliberately ignored, my heart goes out to those still struggling to be seen.
You are beautiful, just the way you are. Being you already makes the world so much better for all of us. You can never stop believing that, for all our sakes. It shouldn’t have to be a burden, but on the days that it is, Thank You for bearing it. You are deeply loved.
Bye, Bye, Bi?? Ridiculous.
Be Bi, Be Boss.
Happy LGBT History Month.
Spectra writes about media, pop culture, identity politics and social change through the lens of Love at www.spectraspeaks.com.
Spectra is an award-winning Nigerian writer, thought leader, and afrofeminist social commentator at Spectra Speaks, a digital media platform shifting conversations from the political to the personal through the lens of love, empathy, and media.
She is the founder and executive editor of Queer Women of Color Media Wire (QWOC Media Wire, http://www.qwoc.org/, a media advocacy organization that amplifies the voices of queer diaspora communities around the world, and the Community Engagement officer at Africans in the Diaspora (AiD), a philanthropic organization that nurtures principled philanthropy in Africa. She’s also the principal at her boutique consulting firm which supports private and public sector ventures in their use of strategic communications and digital media.
Her work using media to amplify the voices of socially-excluded communities has earned her international recognition, appearing on both mainstream and alternative media outlets, including ABC network, Huffington Post, Ms. Magazine, Curve Magazine, Racialicious, BET,and a myriad of print publications.
In her spare time, Spectra curates art and music events, hosts the monthly podcast, Kitchen Table Conversations (global thought leaders interviews about gender, politics, and pop culture), and supports indie and mainstream films, books, and music projects by African diaspora, women and/or queer artists of color via a plethora of media advocacy and philanthropic initiatives. She is currently editing a collection of poetry from LGBT Africa for an upcoming anthology, and planning a queer afrofeminist wedding with her soulmate. Her mantra is “Love is my revolution.”
(published with permission from Spectra Speaks)