Today is the final day of the campaign to bring awareness about our bisexual community and it’s issues to the rest of the world. We conclude with #BiAllies. We asked our allies who include our love ones this question. “How do I be a Bi-Ally?” And here are some of our responses…
‘How am I a bi ally?”
By listening, not judging and treating that person the same way I would want to be treated with respect…..listening is the most important part.
How to Be a Bi-Ally
I believe it’s different for each individual but what being a bi-ally means to me is that I make it known to everyone that my friendship is a judgement free zone. I try my best to love people for everything that they are and not just the one thing that tethers them to a letter within the LGBTQA acronym. That being said, the focus of this is bisexuality and I wanted to take a few seconds to say what I could about that.
Growing up in a small town in northeast Kentucky didn’t really prepare me for the diversity in the world. I can now say that despite my ignorance in my younger years I truly believe that everyone has a right to be who they want to be and love who they want to love as long as no one is getting hurt. I’ll say that in my small group of friends I don’t have many people who have identified themselves to me as bisexual but as for the few that have, I can’t imagine my life without them.
If anyone approached me today with questions on bisexuality or were looking for someone to help them through their struggle, I would absolutely do whatever I could to make sure they felt safe and comfortable to talk to me. I’d support them and encourage them so that they knew it wasn’t wrong or invalid that they feel an attraction to both sexes. It doesn’t make them sluts, deviants, or sex fiends. I think that’s one of the biggest misconceptions that I’ve seen, and I’d very much like to discredit it as soon as possible. I would do my best to start an open dialogue immediately and any questions I couldn’t answer myself I’d find someone who could.
The only thing you need to be a bi-ally, is human decency and to care about others. That’s it… everyone has the capacity to be a bi-ally. And although I would love to call myself one, all I ever really wanted to be known as, is friend.
“I was asked to explain how I’m a Bi-ally. Well the answer is I support my fiancé emotionally and give her virtual cuddles when she needs them. Otherwise I don’t throw a hissy fit about other people’s lives. It’s not my place to judge so I don’t. Aside from some minor work co-admining a FB group for bi-het couples, all I really do is offer quiet support and not be an arrogant asshole.”
Bisexual Awareness should not be limited to one week. The Bisexual Perspective is vital to the LGBT + community and offers a bond that is woven tight which connects us all.
I have been an activist most of my life and I have made it my life’s work to try to be the best ALLY that I can be for EVERYONE #BiAllies #BiWeek #BiPride @glaad @BiNetUSA @NYABN
Faith Cheltenham, President of BiNetUSA
What are some ways we ally ourselves and would like to be allied? One thing I’m learning to do is ally minorities when they dont always share all of my minority intersections. For instance I personally see it sad that so many people have scoffed at the importance of recognizing bi men and one of the first anthologies for bi men, certainly one of the most important from the last several years. In fact the books often written by bi men and about bi men aren’t celebrated either, hence so much of the research, literature, media representation and stories are about bi women whether they be based in curiosity or genuine care. As a black person I am a minority in my country and what that means for me is as important as what it means to be a double minority who lives in a bi world where being a woman is very much a majority. I really believe that if we are to utilize our intersections to electrify our lives we must also employ stop signs, traffic signs and compassionate causeways in our travel to the other lands and persons. We must seek to find ways to acknowledge all our pain and find it as equally valid. I seek to be an ally to bi men, even as I ask they be an ally to me as a female identified bisexual queer consecrated to reproductive justice and destruction of the patriarchy. For me it’s a pretty core belief and one that is frequently shared within my writing as well as amongst the writing of many amazing women of the bisexual movement. We dominate the field of discussion and are frequent faces of the community as is to be expected because of a consistent gender breakdown in bisexual community statistics. Bi women are often visible in super damaging ways, but I will not dismantle the house of patriarchy by duplicating its form to insist that one gender is better than another. Instead I will continue to seek parity and stay aware that its important to highlight, emphasize, and illuminate parts of our community when they are too often hid.
Tweet @thebicast #BiWeek #BiAllies with you thoughts on being an ally…